(37 votes, average: 4.43 out of 5)
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Welcome back to baseball America. We’re less than one month from Opening Day and it’s time to honor those that got us through the off-season. This week John Thorn was named the Official Historian of Major League Baseball, Jonah Keri’s book releases today, and I watched virtually every old school video MLB Network featured this off-season. Therefore, time to honor all of you that talked me through the cold winter. Enjoy.
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March 8th, 2011 at 7:58 pm
Screw the video show about Ruth. I want to know how the BSG “virtually watched every old school video…”?? What kind of screaming, bitching tech do YOU own dude? To VIRTUALLY WATCH? How does that feel? Is it like smelling and eating all the hot dogs in those old stands? Do you get to point to the place in the outfield where you (as the VIRTUAL Ruth and others) are going to knock it out of the park?
Oh, you mean you “WATCHED VIRTUALLY every…” not “VIRTUALLY WATCHED…”
There is a huge difference. BTW, what does BSG stand for? Could it be: “Basically Slaughters Grammar”? “Brutally Slays Grammar”? “Be Studying Grammar”? Or how about: “Bypassed Studying Grammar”?
Any other suggestions for that abbreviation out there? And please, no abbreviated suggestions!
March 9th, 2011 at 12:33 am
Shut up dick.
March 9th, 2011 at 2:04 pm
Oh, an abbreviated, illiterate, suggestion. How unexpected. And to think, you even sang a song about me, Mr.(DION Francis) DeMucci! You remember “The Wanderer,” right? One of your two big hits in 1961? The irony of it all. Go get an education and a sense of humor. ‘Miniscule Minds’ for $100, please, Alex. And the answer is…
March 10th, 2011 at 12:43 am
So is your name ‘The Wanderer’ or ‘The Wanderr’? It’s spelled two different ways, that’s why I’m confused.
Either way you’re a total dick with no life.
March 10th, 2011 at 8:05 am
This was fantastic. Scott Cooper name-drop!
March 10th, 2011 at 9:58 am
Ohhhhhhh….THANK YOU! That was genius. Honig’s band-aid should have its own Facebook page.
March 10th, 2011 at 10:25 am
10 kinds of awesome!
March 10th, 2011 at 10:47 am
Thanks for including me … I think.
March 10th, 2011 at 3:42 pm
You always said you set out to be an actor, BSG. Bravo!
And Wanderer, I’m pretty sure that you’ve gotten similarly agngry on some of my funny stuff for grammatical errors (dead serious). Relax, it happens.
March 11th, 2011 at 9:52 am
“Welcome back to baseball America.” You forgot a comma! A comma! What kind dimwit are you battingstanceguy? There is a huge difference between “Welcome back to baseball, America” and “Welcome back to baseball America.” It’s a difference of exceedingly great scope! Ambiguity has arisen!
And to The Wanderer: You have all kinds of misplaced quotation marks. I can’t understand what you’re writing because I’m boiling with Internet rage. And now for a Godwin: Hitler misplaced his quotation marks and millions of Jews and gypsies died.
March 14th, 2011 at 3:27 pm
thank you! laughter, good medicine.
March 15th, 2011 at 8:09 pm
I’m releived some folks can still detect satire in this day and age. Others, it appears, are too hung-up on calling people names that include profanity. Please note I did not (and would not) revert to any nasty, vulgar abbreviations regarding BSG. First of all, that would have been too easy and far too lowbrow, but, secondly, would run counter to my aim. When you put it out there you have to take it in sometimes. Those who can’t laugh at themselves are destined to face worse than jokes. My mea culpa is that I DID miss a comma or twenty. But Hitler, really? You are evidently far younger than I, Mover. And in dire need of perspective. Also, please pardon any confusion about “Wanderr” vs “Wanderer”. My email for 15 yrs has been: …wanderr@… I suppose I must have subconciously wanted to relegate myself to a level that would subject me to as much derision as I dished out. As stated, when you put it out there you have to take it in sometimes. And, Mevs, thanks for the fair appraisal. Be at ease that I am relaxed, and resting, and assured. Peace, now go have some fun in life!
March 15th, 2011 at 8:12 pm
And, yes, that “releived” was for all y’all. Enjoy.
March 26th, 2011 at 8:29 pm
Excellent!!
April 6th, 2011 at 11:24 am
Hilarious.
Shauneghessy, Hirdt and Guillen were my favorites.
Hope you’re brushing up on your Peter Gammons.
And can a brother get a Mike Greenwell reference next time?
May 24th, 2011 at 8:07 pm
“Babe Ruth had 4,000 less at bats than Henry Aaron.” Great stuff.
May 24th, 2011 at 8:10 pm
Ha ha. Did some checking, and he really did have 4,000 less at bats. It was so well done I thought that was one of the jokes. Again-great work man.
July 20th, 2011 at 9:45 am
Awesome! I watched Ken Burns’ Baseball this summer and many of these impressions were instantly recognizable.
How about famous baseball broadcasters next?
Keep it up!
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